Beyond Apex

Are you a little nervous about making the first move on a date? When you reflect about the final one, do you feel ashamed? Maybe you’re not sure how to act in public on a first date. Maybe you’re unsure about how to initiate a date? In such case, you are not alone. Most people still find dating difficult and confusing, even in the age of Tinder and Match.com.

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The good news is that, with the right approach, you may avoid some of the most common mistakes and anxieties. Going on a date will become something to look forward to, rather than something to fear.

Creating a market that is uncontested and drives out rivals is the goal of a “blue ocean” approach. Still, it applies to personal life just as much as it does to business. One of the tools we utilized to come up with first date ideas here was the Eliminate-Reduce-Raise-Create (ERRC) grid, developed by Chan Kim and Renee Mauborgne, the authors of the internationally best-selling Blue Ocean Strategy. Creating and generating more of what potential customers (your date, in this case!) could find useful as well as eliminating or reducing what they don’t are both aspects of adding value.

Suggestions for First Dates

Using these tips will turn your dream of a great first date into a reality. You will stand out among the plethora of comparable dates. These are great tips for first dates for both men and women.

1. Steer clear of circumstances that are unduly complicated.

On your first date with someone you don’t know too much about, it’s normal to feel anxious. Don’t complicate things further by attempting to plan the perfect romantic lunch or a whole day. Instead, keep things simple and concise. Over a cup of coffee in a convenient location, you may quickly decide if this is someone you would like to spend more time with on your date. Adding a little uncertainty to the mix, if all goes as planned, the coffee may even turn into lunch or dinner.

2. Steer clear of unnecessary stress

Being a little anxious is natural on a first date—in fact, it makes the experience half the fun. On the other hand, you ought to make an effort to steer clear of any strain that can irritate you and ruin your date. Remember that if you are more relaxed, your date will feel more comfortable with you. One simple strategy is to sit at a right angle to your date rather than immediately facing them. This frees you both up to spend some people-watching, since it eliminates the pressure of needing to fill in every lull throughout the conversation.

3. Give up texting in favor of in-person meetings.

The discussion shouldn’t linger on a website or app for too long, even though that’s where it started. Even though texting may be a useful method for getting to know someone, developing a real rapport also requires paying attention to nonverbal clues like body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions. Thus, go meet the real person hidden behind the words rather than waste time on an internet connection.

4. Before your first date, prepare a few conversation starters.

One may think, “How should I prepare for a first date?”

Given that you would never show up for a job interview unprepared, why should a first date be any different? Think about these interesting questions to ask someone you’re dating as well as some interesting answers to such queries. To avoid raising suspicions, don’t treat the first date like an interview, though.

What topics ought to be covered on your first date?

We created a blog article with conversation starters and first date ideas to help you get on a second date!

But first, admit that you’re nervous! Honesty has a great deal of power.

To get some clever ideas for topics, things to ask, and conversation openers for your first date, check out our blog post, What to Talk about on a First Date: Dos and Don’ts.

Never forget that on a first date, questions are just as important as answers. In actuality, listening carefully and making sure the other person is comfortable are the most important things to do. Therefore, keep away of touchy themes like sex or money. While on a first date, it’s not a good idea to inquire about the other person’s salary or the cause of the split.

5. Boost your confidence

People like hanging out with confident people. Furthermore, body language is a powerful signal that may tell a date a lot about you. One way to boost your confidence is to practice some “power posing” in advance. Try standing for a few minutes with your hands on your hips in an authoritative position and see yourself as a superhero to trick your brain into thinking you are more confident. To prevent seeming silly, just don’t do anything on the exact date.

6. Develop your listening skills

Though everyone likes to speak about themselves, don’t assume that your date is one of those people. In actuality, making everything about you conveys the incorrect ideas. Still, it’s not appropriate to simply turn off and let your date talk all by themselves—that’s also a surefire way to end things badly. The key is to listen intently and respond appropriately when someone summarizes something and then asks, “So, you spent three months in Argentina, how was that?” for example.

7. Create a strong first impression

First impressions count. Based only on your appearance and demeanor, someone could form an opinion about you in a matter of seconds. One of the best ways to make a good impression is to smile. A pleasant person has a propensity to smile, which is a skill that can be learned and a sign of contentment. Smiling more often will make you feel better and help others around you feel better too. It’s all about those positive emotions!

Take some time to dress appropriately for the occasion and in keeping with your signature style. Just as you wouldn’t show up at a cocktail party in your shorts and t-shirt, you shouldn’t show up at a café dressed in a tuxedo.

8. Stay loyal to who you are

Perhaps dating has always been competitive in the 21st century, as it might feel at times. However, far too frequently, we assess our value by comparing it to others who we believe to be “winning,” which leads us to try to copy and enhance what others are doing rather than paving our own path.

However, dating ought not to be a game of victors and losers. Finding a meaningful relationship with someone who makes you happy and who you can make happy in return is important. Only when you remain true to who you are and allow your genuineness to come through will this be achievable.